Robbed of momentum

Why am i doing this?

Trading in precious holiday time, friends and family for stubborn pride of mine. That stubborn will. Which got me to where i am.

Ten tasks.

ALL VOLUNTARY.

Why don't i just throw in the towel and use this period to work like some people? Earn extra cash for whatever reason?

I can don't help jianwei with FOCC. I can screw the smoking cessation clinic by Mr. Woo. Why bother, since it's directed at the batch 1 people?
I can don't care so much about the emed events. Nor join emed as a Publicity Head almost one year ago. Nor prepare so much for a birthday party. I can totally heck care the brown bagging sessions, giving some lame reasons like i got work. I can don't do the brown bagging video saying my computer spoilt.

I can don't even need to go for YEP, once was good enough. I don't even have to lead, and spend a fortune pre-trip. Maybe the YEP i went, wasn't even necessary. I can save the money for whatever purpose.

I can totally screw the pharm rag preparations. Why was i so big-mouth to volunteer to dance again this year? wasn't once already so shitty?

I can totally just study, study, study, study and study and pray i'll get CAP 5. I can only have four functions: study, eat, sleep, shit.

Constance is right. why am i spending precious time in all these events. When i need a rest, the next rest stop is after Sem 6. After 24th Jun, the only time i have for rest is - one year later. by then i'll probably have screwed all the year 3 modules cos i didn't get enough rest. Who have i to blame?

MYSELF.

My goddamned self.

Why do i try so hard in live for? Maybe i shouldn't even have survived the operation when i was 15 years old.

Darned.

"Want to be a goddamn hero izzit?" Heroes die for nothing or stupid causes. Do you wanna die for nothing or stupid causes?